So, I missed Monday's post (sorry!), but I fully plan on completing the rest of the week. In light of light, here is my addition to Character Blogfest. The rules for today are as follows:
February 8th - Wednesday - Dialogue Introduction: Have two characters introduce each other using only dialogue—no backstory, no internalization, just dialogue between the two. Max 250 words.
I've cheated a wee bit today. I've actually got four characters making introductions. This is a excerpt right out of my latest book. It's longer than what you are seeing here (had to cut back for word count requirements!). And I've switched this excerpt from third to first person. I hope it makes sense!
Here goes:
A red head boy eyed me. “You look like someone dumped you out of a trash compactor.”
“Whadoyou care?” I deposited myself in the nearest seat.
An impish girl who looked like she was getting ready to jump out of her own skin touched my hair. “What’s wrong with your hair?”
I smacked her hand away. “Don’t touch me.”
“Hey.” A buff-kid bumped my shoulder. “No need to be rude.”
I lurched up and shoved him. “You don’t touch me, either.”
“Whoa!” Red head boy stepped in between us. “We don’t even know what’s going on. No need to be at each other throats already.”
Buff-kid nodded. “Ralph’s got a point. But you, smurf girl—” He pointed a sharp finger at me. “Need to be nicer.”
“No name callin’,” Imp blondie called out from under her curtain of hair.
I held up my hand. “Here’s an idea— stop talking to me.” I slid back down in my seat.
“The names Deuce.” Buff-kid held out his hand. I didn’t take it and he dropped it to his side. “This is Ralph.” He pointed to the red-head kid half his size. “And I think her name is Rose or Violet or something.”
“It’s Paisley,” the blond girl stated.
“Whatever. I knew it was some kind of flower.”
I barked a laugh. “It’s not a flower, idiot. It’s a tear drop pattern shaped like a kidney originating from India.”
Deuce scrunched his face. “Whatever. And you are?”
“Mitzi.”
"Well, Mitzi ... what are you in for?"
* * *
And there you have it! If you would like to check out the other entries for the blogfest today, go check out the Live to Right blog.
~JD
23 comments:
Totally drawn into the scene. Great dialog.
I can never do multiple people talking with such ease!!
Yay - great voices!! Take care
x
Nice dialogue amongst so many. I love the last line. Now I'm hooked.
I loved it . It sounds like detention and it was believable as well.
Nice way to introduce them. The ending makes me want to know more, too.
Love it! Sounds like they're in a unique setting, too.
Nice job. Sounds like they might be in some trouble.
You have talent! I was skeptical coming in--what with four characters, and all--but you handled it beautifully.
I bow to you!
What is Mitzi in for? I wanna know!
Nice work.
Having a Breakfast Club moment :) Awesome!
It's very difficult to juggle more than two characters when writing dialogue but you made it look very easy!
Justine--"What are you in for" great last line. You handled 4 characters very well. They were all distinct. Great job :)
This is great, Justine. It's hard to juggle so many characters and you did it well. Love how tough the narrator is.
Interesting characters - love the names your characters give each other, and the way they interact. Where are they? Prison? Orphanage? The Back of an Unmarked van?
i like the twist at the end giving us the setting. great dialog!
Oh man - totally leave us hangin'! No fair! I'm all wrapped up in their conversation and the story. It rocks. Great job :)
What are you in for? That's a great ending. What to read on now.
Awesome voice. Really, really loved this. Great job!
*New Follower!* So nice to *meet* you!
Lots of attitude flying back and forth there. Love it! :)
Yay! I'm so glad I'm not the only rule breaker!
Loved this! Got a taste for their voices and i love the name Mitzi.
Awesome back and forth! All the characters are so distinct and I want to know where they are and what they're in for :)
ohh...awesome back and forth. The end is intriguing too. I wonder where they are.
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